Top 10 Things Not to Tell An Employer in an Interview

humor kid brain smartIt matters what you say in interviews. Here is a humorous look at what NOT to say in a job interview:

10. “How do I deal with difficult people?
Well, that depends on who would notice if they disappeared after a late night at the office…”

9. “My highest achievement in life is staying put in this office with your cologne.”

8. “Résumé? I prefer non-French words. How about ‘The Condensed Life & Times of An Extraordinary and Amazing Person Who You Will Bitterly Regret Passing By If You Foolishly Choose To Do So?'”

7. “Five years from now? You mean, assuming that I’m still on earth?”

6. “Um, I don’t know the current version of that program. But back in ’97, I did. The theory’s probably the same. It’s like riding a bike, you know?”humor used car salesman

5. “I’m a real people person. People are by far my favorite kind of persons. All kinds of people.”

4. “Look me in the eye, and tell me if I ain’t the most honest-lookin’ person you would trust to handle the company’s money.”

3. “Oh-my-Gosh, you need to give me this job because it’s, like, fate or something. I had a dream that I was running  through this exact office with a Nerf gun with a giant pig chasing after me.”

2.”Yeah, a moment where I demonstrated teamwork was when me and my girlfriends totally rocked it in the amateur beer chugging contest at Scuzzy’s and donated our winnings to charity. We totally trashed our competition.”

1. “How would I describe myself in three words or less? Loyal, handworking, and, uhhm, ah, um, Smart”?


  1. Very timely! Someone I know and love is on the job search and interviewing next week. I’ll take a closer look and your website and find some DO’s for the interview…!

    Enjoy the rest of the Challenge.

  2. Great list! I think my favorite was number 3. Number 2 is a pretty close second though.

    I’m sure people who are trying to find a job will appreciate you adding some humor to their day!

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